Would You And Justin Bieber Be A Perfect Match Or A Disaster

My 12 year old pre-pubescent daughter, Addy, is not talking to me.

And while one might expect this to be normal, to be par for the course for any 12 year old girl and her mother, for us it’s not. Oh sure, we have our moments – like when she tells me that she’s going to stop talking to me until I buy her the cute kaki capris with the embroidered pockets.

Oh yeah? Have a nice life there, Addy. Drop me a line once in a while.

Or when I won’t let her get up from the table without at least trying the new recipe.

Mom! It looks GROSS!!!

Not a problem, my girl. You can sit there until morning, I have the time.

(By the way, 9 times out of 10 not only does she try it but she usually finishes it and asks for more).

And it’s not even due to the many times I’ve picked her up from a friend’s house blasting, singing and dancing to Barry Manilow’s Copacabana.

Apparently this time – according to Addy anyway – I’ve committed a mortal sin. I’ve crossed a line from which I can never return.

Yup. I scored as the Perfect Match! (You’re totally his type!) on the Justin Bieber “Are You Justin’s Skater Girl Quiz” found in Tiger Beat magazine while my daughter Addy scored only an Almost There! (You’re kinda crushing!).

Perfect Match!

Oh the humanity.

Last night I had to listen to the heart-sickened wailings of how unfair life was and how could I? Just, just, how could I?

So here you go, this is how I did it. This is how I pulled off the most unfair-emotionally-romantic coupe of the century. Consider this your Bieber cheat sheet:

• I’ve never skateboarded before.

• If I have trouble skating, I’d laugh about it and try again (the other option was to enter an emo state of embarrassment and then try again – definitely not my style)

• When (if) I land a skating trick, I would hug Justin instead of high-five him. (oh please, it would be like hugging a cute, adorable, chipmunk)

• And if Justin hurt himself doing a trick I would check to see if he was okay instead of teasing him. (Did I mention that I’m a mom?)

So Justin Bieber fans of the world take note – (Addy are you listening?) if you’ve never skated, have a good sense of humor, and have an ounce of compassion – you’re in like Flynn with Justin. Expect a call tonight.

And moms of Justin Bieber fans? If Justin falls while skate boarding, just say that you’d tease him. It makes for a much more pleasant household that way.